This child was a gift in my life, and all I want for him is the gift of a truly happy life. Is that too much to ask?
When I think of my one and only child; and I picture him in my mind’s eye, the first word that comes to me is BEAUTIFUL!
Yes, it is true, he is a looker, but that is not where his beauty lies. It comes from his heart and from his mind.
His beauty stems from his sensitive soul that can see another child in need of some thing; that drives him to attain that same something for another child. His wonderful heart that has devoted 4 years of his life to growing his hair out because he saw a little girl in a St. Jude Children’s Hospital video openly express her hope that someone would donate hair so she could have a wig. In his brave heart that has courageously endured the taunts and the teasing by some of his peers, as well as being repeatedly and mistakenly referred to as a girl, by strangers. His caring heart and sensitive soul that loves all living things so much so, that spiders are not for squashing, they are for setting free outside in the yard.
His beauty lies also in his wondrous mind that is so much smarter than his dear old mother’s; his mind, that captures the ear of those around him with words that would otherwise belong to someone much older than him. It is in his beautiful mind that imagines the most wonderful possibilities; and gives birth to ideas that other 9 year olds would not of yet conceived of. His mind that is so analytic and technical and literal that he surprises and intrigues most adults around him. His mind that I am told is gifted with an IQ in the very superior range, that should be enriched and encouraged to grow in knowledge and interest
When I think of my little “Alphabet Boy” with his ADHD/ODD/SPD/LMNOP, the second word that comes to mind is SAD!
This child with all his exuberance; wicked intelligence; and killer smile should not be this unhappy with life or with himself. But he is. This beautiful boy with his gifted mind and his beautiful and sensitive heart is also a very sad and lonely little boy, and it breaks my heart into a billion little pieces.
He is not like most other 9 year olds. He’s different, and quirky, and weird. I have often said he marches to the beat of his own drum. He is as unique, as an individual can be. And I love him in all his uniqueness. But I weep for him too. Because his differences make him feel so badly about himself.
Recently, we have had so new revelations about Leon and what makes him the way he is, Hopefully we can find some answers, and perhaps show Leon how to love himself as much as we love him.