Just call me Jiji

…me, just pretending to be me ….now, where did I put that cape??

Archive for the tag “flare up”

WTF – What The Fibro is Wrong with Me?

 In my previous post I recounted my past six months of Fibro flare-up hell.

It feels all wrong! Not that there is ever anything right about Fibro; but this has been wronger then usual.

Is my fibro changing? Getting Worse?

Actually that is a really dumb question. Of course it is changing. As we age we change, stands to reason that our disabilities change too. Some things get easier to tolerate, while other things get worse.

But what if I am not getting worse? What if this is something completely different all together? It is all too easy to just blame everything on fibro all the time. But the possibility that I could have something in addition to FMS, is feasible, isn’t it? What if I was completely misdiagnosed all together?

This year of pain and exhaustion has felt so intensely bad that this can’t just be my fibro; it HAS to be something more than that.  …Doesn’t it?

I know, I know, that’s what my doctor is for. But there have been issues with the whole seeking medical attention thing this past year. My last visit with my primary care doctor in 2010 was for my routine 3 month fibro maintenance follow-up in October. It was before this flare-up really reared its ugly head, so I reported that I was feeling pretty good at the time. Then winter came in and decimated me with freezing cold weather and blizzards. My regularly scheduled winter flare-up tore me down, big time.

My next 3 month appointment which was scheduled for the end of January, didn’t work out, because I had to reschedule it due to the fact that Ron had commandeered my van for work when his car died and I no longer had transportation. Well, that and it was so bitterly cold that I just couldn’t get out of bed, let alone my house.

Unfortunately, I had to cancel the March appointment too. My sister was in the hospital and sadly, at 23 weeks pregnant, lost her baby. It was a very difficult month both in the weeks prior when the complications in her pregnancy arose, and after – as this was a terrible loss.

We all mourn the loss of the sweet little girl who was taken before we could know her but not before we loved her.

It was the beginning of April that I FINALLY met with my doctor. But it wasn’t a regular maintenance visit; it was a sick visit – for my nasal/bronchial issues. Dr. T is pretty much a stickler about only getting into what the appointment was scheduled for so I was shooed out of the examining room before I had a chance to go into any details about what was going on. But not before he suggested I see a Physiatrist first and then go back and see him. I think he was reprimanding/punishing me for not keeping my appointments…

I had no idea what a physiatrist was, so I looked it up here. And after I checked out the doctor’s website, I felt hopeful that this was going to be my answer. After months of no energy or strength, and constant fatigue and pain I was more than ready for answers. When I spoke with the receptionist to make my appointment, I had to admit that it had been more than 6 years since I had any MRI’s or other testing done. Because up till now I was maintaining my Fibro with meds; and flare-ups, although still painful, came and then WENT.

She told me not to worry; the doctor would order all new tests. When I got off the phone I felt a sense of relief. I just wanted to get answers to what was going on with me. And, here was a doctor that “instead of treating only specific symptoms and illnesses, a D.O. will regard your body as an integrated whole”, according to his website.

I had been going through so much difficulty and pain, all I wanted was to start anew. The seasons were changing and I was tired of hibernating. I had spent so long trapped in my home by the cold weather; my illness; and with still no transportation; and although I still felt like utter crap, I had to force myself to join the land of the living again, if anything, for sanity’s sake. I had been a shut in for so long that even my friendships were suffering. I tend to withdraw from people; friends and family alike; when things get this raw (read painful and depressing). And believe me this was raw!

In my effort to reconnect with my friends (and family) I felt I owed it to them to clarify why I needed to withdraw so much, why I bailed on commitments I had made, why I could not be reached by phone or even return messages. I felt I had to explain that I don’t mean to be a lousy friend, who forgets things, breaks promises, and just disappears.

In the process, of explaining what I was going through, I surprisingly had three separate people who didn’t even know each other suggest that it sounded like I had MS.

MS? Really? multiple sclerosis

I had heard of MS; but in truth I didn’t know anything about it, at all. It would never have occurred to me. When the first person said something to me I did what I always do; I disregarded the possibility that it could be anything but Fibro. After all, I had my diagnosis, and it took forever to get that in the first place, I didn’t want to start questioning it, no way.

But then a second friend suggested it as well. She knew a lot about it and started describing me, to me. All I could do was keep sit there nodding and saying, “Yeah, that’s me!”, “that’s exactly what’s happening to me”, “you are describing me”; her response was, “no, I am describing MS”.

Thoughts that crept around in my head: Oh crap!! Do I have MS? Wait! What the hell is MS?; What are the symptoms?; How do I know if this is what I have?; Do I really wanna know?

So I peeked, just a little, I looked it up on the internet. Just enough to get general info. I am all for getting self-informed and getting educated about something like ADHD, for instance, when your child has been diagnosed with it. But with this, I just didn’t want to read so much in to it, that I’d start self-diagnosing before I even see the doctor. What I read up on was the basics; the symptoms and how one get’s diagnosed.  I also read that it isn’t unheard of for someone suffering from MS to be misdiagnosed with Fibro.

As my appointment with the physiatrist drew nearer I got more and more emotional about how bad this whole year has been so far because of some illness that I have. I just wanted answers and I felt that in order to do that I need to start from scratch. I want to wipe the slate clean and start fresh as if I had never gotten my diagnosis for FMS all those years ago. Like I mentioned earlier, it is all too easy to pigeon-hole everything into Fibro without considering there might be something else going on.

A few hours before my appointment, I sat down and I just started writing and I kept writing until I had 3 pages full of what I needed to remember to discuss with the doctor. I listed symptoms, body parts affected, descriptions of the level of pain I was feeling, the emotional toll it was taking on me, etc.

It was unfortunate that after all the time I took to prepare, I ended up forgetting it all at home. I was beside myself. The poor doctor did not know what to do with me. I just started crying and crying. I could not get my thoughts together, I was forgetting everything I wanted to talk about AND what was worse was this doctor just was not living up to my expectations. I wanted him to have all the answers, to fix me, to order the tests that were going to get me my answers.

The doctor didn’t actually do anything wrong, he was just not right for me. He focused on the pain in my arms and scheduled an EKG/nerve test. Through my tears I managed to tell him I felt that that wasn’t enough. What about the pains in the rest of my body? His response was that he wanted to focus on one thing at a time and he advised me to go back to my primary care physician for a referral to a rheumatologist for my fibro.

I left there in tears. I cried all the way home and by the time I walked back into my house I was sobbing uncontrollably; poor Ron and Leon had no idea what was going on and were very concerned.

I want a doctor that was going to treat the whole of me; not just the parts of me. This is not what I got in this doctor. I realize that I had put way too much stock in this one visit, and my hopes and expectations were waaaay too high. I was overly emotional, and at a loss. Now what?

The fact is I don’t see a rheumatologist although I know I should, but after never being able to get an appointment with the one that I initially had, the one who diagnosed the fibro, I began to rely on the neurologist that she had sent me to. I was maintaining fairly well with the meds that my neuro had prescribed.  Eventually I lost my neuro too, due to the fact that she became ill and left the practice. In the end I never did find a new rheumatologist or neurologist; my primary care doctor was prescribing the medications I needed, so I felt that there was no need to find another one; till now that is.

Last week I met with my primary care physician, to discuss a plan. This time I did not forget my notes. Even so, I was still a blubbering fool, with tears falling uncontrollably from my eyes, as I explained how bad things had gotten and how lost I felt. I explained that I was concerned that what is going on with me was something worse than Fibro and I shared the suspicions of MS that others and now myself had. In the end my doctor told me that he feels that I have extreme Fibromyalgia and that I am suffering from severe depression; he also feels that I am beyond his help at this point and he referred me to a rheumatologist and a psychiatrist. When I questioned the MS again, he told me that he felt it was unlikely that I had MS at all. I would love to just accept that but I am too worried about something being over looked because it is too easy to stick with the original diagnosis. He gave me the name of a neurologist to call, if I felt the need to pursue it.

I do and I did. Feel the need to pursue it I mean. I have an appointment with both a rheumatologist and a neurologist next week. I have not scheduled an appointment with a psychiatrist yet as I have yet to find one that takes my insurance.

In the several days it has taken me to write this post (I can only do a little at a time due to the pain in my arms and hands) the tears have seemed to come to a halt. Writing and getting all these thoughts and feelings out of my head seems to help a lot. But I will bring the tissues to my next appointment; just in case. 😉

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HAPPY New Year!?!???

Well, I had to say it, didn’t I? This is after all my first post of 2011.

Thing is I’m not feeling’ so Happy New Yearish at the moment. It’s part of why it’s taken me this long to post something. It’s not that there haven’t been any happy occasions, events, or news to post about; there have actually, and I want to share them, especially because some very good things have been happening with Leon; it’s just that, well, I am just too damn tired (and in pain) to even think clearly. And not the I just have so much to do tired either. It’s more like the, just walking from the couch to the bathroom and back has me feeling like all my energy just drained out of me and I can’t move, type of tired.

There is no doubt about it; this winter is really messing with my fibro BIG TIME. Mother Nature and Jack Frost have teamed up to kick my butt!

Here is today’s forecast from the National Weather Center:

Winter Storm Warning

  • Statement as of 9:52 PM EST on January 26, 2011
    … Winter Storm Warning remains in effect until 6 am EST
    Thursday…A Winter Storm Warning remains in effect until 6 am EST Thursday.

* Locations… portions of northeast New Jersey… New York City
and southern Long Island.

* Hazards… heavy snow.

* Accumulations… 8 to 14 inches of snow… with locally higher
amounts possible.

* Winds… north winds of 10 to 20 mph with gusts up to 30 mph are
expected across New York City and northeast New Jersey.

* Timing… a wintry mix of snow… sleet… and freezing rain…
becoming a moderate to heavy snow this evening… and a heavy
snow overnight. Up to a quarter of an inch of ice this evening.

Special Weather Statement

    • Statement as of 1:13 am EST on January 27, 2011
      … Heavy snow will impact Bergen… Bronx… Essex… Fairfield…
      Hudson… Kings (Brooklyn)… Middlesex… Nassau… New Haven… New York
      (Manhattan)… Passaic… Queens… Richmond (Staten Island)…
      Rockland… Suffolk… Union… Westchester and western New London
      counties…At 1257 am EST… National Weather Service Doppler radar was tracking
      a wide band of heavy snow extending from northern Connecticut
      through Long Island and New York City.

Snowfall rates within this band are between 2 to 3 inches per
hour… but could be as high as 4 inches per hour in the heaviest
portions of the band in Nassau… western Suffolk… New Haven and
Middlesex counties.

In addition… gusty winds between 20 and 30 mph with occasional
gusts up to 35 mph will occur causing blowing and drifting
snow….and reducing visibilities to 1/2 mile or less.

Motorists should exercise extreme caution.

A Winter Storm Warning remains in effect for the area.

We’ve already had so many storms so far this New Year that I’ve lost count at this point and it’s only January.  These storms have been so frequent and so on top of each other, the effects of which are unbearable. It’s times like this that I am most aware of my Fibro …obviously!

Last week a friend got an up-close peak into my life with Fibro, when she stopped by to invite Leon and me over and found me curled up in a ball on the couch, with my head resting in Ron’s lap as I wept because the pain was that intense. I think it really took her by surprise. This invisible disability suddenly became visible.  Being the wonderful friend that she is, she took Leon so I didn’t have to worry about him seeing me like that.

I actually felt a bit embarrassed that she had seen me like that.

I know I should not be embarrassed by the situation but it is very rare for someone to see me with that bad of a flare-up, and in that much pain, and THAT vulnerable.

Not that I haven’t had flare-ups before in front of people. It’s just that, well, it isn’t always so blatant. The pain is always there alright, and occasionally someone will comment or make a joke about me walking like a crumpled up old women before I can straighten myself up, but usually it will go unnoticed. But Friday’s flare-up, that was something all together different that was what I usually refer to as a “lost in the pain” flare-up. One that gets so bad that I feel completely lost and consumed in the pain.

And with this icy cold, snowy, storm-filled winter I feel like it is freezing me in time and incapacitating me to the point that I cannot even function in my own life right now. I have been out of commission since this year began.  As a result not only am I suffering but so is my family.

The all over joint pain, headaches, fatigue (serious fatigue), insomnia, and muscle weakness keep me from being able to do normal everyday things, including taking care of my family. The burden then falls on Ron; my dear and wonderful husband. So now his life has been turned upside down too.

Not only does Ron leave the house to work all day, but when he is home he has to take care of the things I can’t.

Much to my dismay and intense gratitude he gets up early with Leon every morning without waking me up. He knows that mornings have always been difficult for me, but right now they are even more so. My insomnia has kept me up till anywhere between 3am and 5am on a regular basis. I am thankful because waking up every morning at 7am and functioning on all cylinders is practically unheard of.  I just wish I could do more in the mornings so Ron could get ready for work stress free.

Ron has to get himself and Leon ready at a time when Leon’s ADHD is at its worst. There always tends to be a battle whether it is about taking a shower, eating his, breakfast or getting dressed for school. I usually wake up to one or the other’s yelling or a phone call telling me, my sister is on her way with my niece, whom I care for while my sister is at work. Although, too often this year I’ve had to send her to my mom’s instead.

As it is I am no longer caring for Nico (my friend’s son), but now my fibro is forcing me to give up more days with Kiera too, making money even scarcer.

While taking care of Kiera can be extremely draining, I at least can nap when I need to, while she does. I just can’t see that being included as a benefit in a real job 😉 , so while money is scarce, I am lucky that my sister needs my help. The major downside then falls to Leon and Ron again.

Generally while caring for Kiera or any child, one would think I could keep up with the house work since I am home anyway. Unfortunately that just isn’t always the case, and right now because of the intensity of my flare -up and especially because of how long it has been lasting, there just isn’t any relief long enough for me to catch up on my housefrau duties. It’s embarrassing!

What is worse, is that rather than let it all pile up, Ron jumps in and picks up the slack. It makes me feel so guilty, because I can see it is taking a toll on him.  The getting up with Leon, and battling him to get ready for school while preparing his breakfast and packing up his lunch, and sticking him on the bus; then he has his job to contend with; only to come home and have to contend with me, who is thoroughly exhausted and mostly immobile from the pain and Leon whose meds have worn off and is talking a mile a minute, bouncing off the furniture, and vary needy at this time of the day.

On my normal days, flare-up or not I would have at least pushed myself  to clean up after the day’s activities, get the dishes done, have Leon’s homework done, fed him and ready for bed by the time Ron got home so that he could at least enjoy himself with their ‘Daddy and Leon bedtime routine’. I’ll be honest, I rarely get all of that done, especially during flare-ups, but I do my very best and depending on the severity of the day I have gotten quite a bit of it done. But right now it’s as if my tush has been glued to either the couch or my bed. Basically I’ve been bedridden (or couch-ridden as it were) since the year began, and if the weather keeps up this way I don’t see it getting any better anytime soon.

I worry about the strain it puts on Ron. Add to that the struggles we face financially at the beginning of each year because of how our medical insurance is structured. Between Leon’s ADHD/ODD meds and my Fibro /ADD meds and our regular doctor visits, we have to come up with a lot of cash in a very short amount of time because we have a $2500.00 deductable to meet. That’s not an easy thing to do when living paycheck to paycheck. This is the time of year when our bills pile up. So on top of the strain my fibro puts on Ron he has this to deal with. Now add to it the fact that Ron’s car has died and can no longer be driven, so he has to use my van until we can afford a new car. At least with me pretty much being bed-ridden I can do without the van for now.

The guilt and the depression that comes with it weigh very heavily on me. I feel responsible for Ron’s stress, and I worry about his health.

So with all that, it hasn’t felt very Happy New Yearish   ….yet

As I said before there have been a few highlights to the year so far, involving Leon, so not all is lost.

But that will have to wait for another day.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Cleaning my plate – part 3 ~Chaos!~

….continued from Cleaning my plate – part 2 

I have another appointment with my doctor in two weeks to discuss how things are going with the Lyrica. Hopefully all will be well and I can go ahead with my next concern, which is Adult ADHD. I really want to get a handle on it. I think the combo of ADHD and Fibro is really throwing me for a loop. And the fact that I am getting older isn’t helping either. It was pointed out to me by someone who has been diagnosed and is in treatment for Adult ADHD that, as women age, our hormone levels start to change and it effects our brain chemistry in such a way that the coping mechanisms that we’d developed through the years to help us adjust to life with ADD start to fail.

That was like another A-HA moment for me.

Given the bad winter and the constant fibro flare-ups I put a lot of blame in that direction, but the facts just maybe that ADHD is also to blame for these feelings of being broken and life falling apart on me all the time. I feel like this whole clean your plate thing is my way of getting my life back in order.

I am not the type of person who thinks a pill can solve every problem. But I’ve had to come to rely on medication for so much. I’ve seen the good, the bad, and the ugly side of medication in both myself and in my son. And when it comes to medication for ADHD, I’ve seen it work wonders for Leon. So that is the direction I want to take in treating my (so far self-diagnosed) ADHD.

 
 
Took a quiz and this was my result:
Serious ADHD Likely!
 

Of course I have developed a coping system over the years but lately I feel that it has broken down, so maybe there is something to the whole changing hormones/brain chemistry thing. 

In the meantime though, as I said I am looking to find new ways of dealing with what life throws at me so that I can make, not just my life: but my family’s (Leon’s in particular) lives more manageable and organized.

Structure is key for people with ADHD, I know I function much better with structure in my life, and so does Leon. I haven’t been able to give that to Leon lately, because I haven’t had it myself as of late.

Some of the things that need working on include:

Getting rid of the C.H.A.O.S …..aka Can’t Have Anyone Over Syndrome (cute huh – I borrowed that from Flylady.net). My house is always such a complete disaster that I am too embarrassed to ever have anyone over. And that includes playdates for Leon.

When he asks for a playdate, I really hate to say no, especially since it is pretty much a basic necessity for him given his need to improve his social skills. I hate it even more that my reason for saying no is because the house is a mess.

Clutter is a major cause of all the chaos in the house. We just have too much “stuff”. A lot of it we don’t need or even have room for.

I am always behind on paperwork, there is piles of it all over the place; a lot of which are projects I intend to get to,but don’t have the time for. Like scrap-booking my last 3 Disney vacations, digitally; or the plans I have to make a behavioral chart for Leon; or the binder of Leon’s ADHD/ODD Medical and Behavioral History. Much of this stuff ends up getting moved to boxes, that I refuse to put in the basement for fear I will forget about them.

I am also suffering from packus-ratus, I save EVERYTHING! Like memorabilia, collectors items, Tchotchkes, sentimental items, even empty boxes 😕 . unfortunately it is a trait that I have passed on to Leon. He has a collection of collections. They include; Thomas trains, Pixar CARS, Pokémon cards, Club Penguin Cards, Silly Bandz, Bakugan, Rocks, Snapple Caps, Magazines, Stitch toys, Tags, Gift Cards, Star Wars Lego’s, and yes, he also collects empty boxes and containers.

Then there’s the fact that it looks like a whole daycare center threw up all over my house.  All the baby items, (from clothes, to high chair, to bouncers and toys) that I had packed neatly away in the hopes of having a second child, can now be found in nearly every room in the house for use with my niece Kiera and my girlfriend’s baby, Nico; whom I babysit everyday.

I am sure I’ve said it before, but after a whole day of keeping the kids happy and busy while cleaning up after them all day, I am just way too exhausted by the end of the day to get everything picked up and put away properly. The end of my day is around 4pm when, all at once my son gets off the bus, yelling something about wanting a playdate, as he dashes by me to get his homework over with so he can move on to better things; while both my sister and my friend come simultaneously to gather up their kids and all that goes with them. I’ve got people coming and I’ve got people going and for some bizarre reason it is also the time of day that I get phone calls, usually from someone whose just wanting to chat (RON!). It is a very chaotic time of day. I just get soooo frazzled.

I just hate that feeling, and I am sure I am failing at trying to keep my composure for Leon, who should and needs to be able to come home to a calm, clutter-free, organized enviroment for him to be able to concentrate and complete his homework and shed the stress of always having to be “on” at school. 

My goal is to get rid of all the unnecessary stuff. And I’ve already started…

….more coming in Cleaning my plate – part 4

It’s Grumpy Wednesday!!

I used to complain on Mondays, but now I complain on Wednesdays. 

What has changed? GAME NIGHT! 

 Ron, my hubby “GAMES” on Wednesdays now instead of Mondays.  Once a week he and “the guys” get together and game.  I feel bad for complaining and being grumpy about it, it’s a good outlet for him. He pretty much has been gaming for over 20 years now and he pretty much still games with the much of same friends for most of his life. How can I dismiss such strong friendships and camaraderie? (wait, is that spelled right?). I guess because I feel that he gets to play a lot more than I do. Not only does he get to have a game night once a week with the guys, but he spends a LOT of time playinggames on his computer. It’s one of the first things he does when he wakes up and one of the last things he does before bed (even on his game nights), and then there is a whole lot of “checking something” on the game in between. Meanwhile I get up and begin working immediately (my sister drops my infant niece with me for childcare at 7:30am). Between caring for Kiera and occasionally another child, I try to get things done around the house. I don’t usually get as much done as I’d like, because I have to take frequent breaks due to my Fibro. But even during my frequent and often short breaks I usually manage to try to get something done.  I feel like I am always working (or in pain, or recovering from pain) and there is always more work to do. When do I get to play? When do I ever get to leave the house for my own personal agenda without a kid attached to my hip, for that matter? When do I get to enjoy time with my husband. When do I get to play, and why does he always seem to find time to play even when much more important things need to get done?

WAIT! I want to stress something here. Ron is not the bad guy. He does do a HUGE amount of stuff around the house. He is a huge help! I often feel guilty about how much he has to do to make up for the slack that I just can’t do. BUT, sometimes I feel like he just a big kid who does not know when to prioritize his responsibilities. He will put off certain crucial things to play. His playing on the computer gets me grumpy, but I try and mostly succeed at holding my tongue, unless it is something crucial (which has been happening alot lately, I’ll admit). But it is his game night that really gets me grumpy. Mostly because it occurs in the evening right after work. which is just about the time that I just completely fizzle out. At 5pm, I am completely done. Pain racks my body, exhaustion sets in, I can’t think or concentrate anymore, my patience has worn thin, and I am holding on by a thread waiting out that last hour for the girls to get picked up by their moms, with a demanding, hyperactive, impulsive, 6 year old who is just coming off of his ADHD medication for the day till Ron comes home to rescue me.

In all honesty it isn’t always like this I do occasionally have my good days. However certain times of the year (like wintertime) the good days get fewer and fewer. So game nights really suck right now because on game nights, Ron leaves for work in the morning and doesn’t come home till after midnight.

 Just as a clarification, game night with the boys is not a night out playing poker, it’s roll-playing games (RPG), you know, like Dungeons & Dragons. That’s how I clarify it to my non-geek friends anyway. Not that there is anything wrong with being a geek. Ron is a big ol’ geek, and I love him for that. I happen to like geeks,  a lot.  

I like this definition from Wikipedia: A person who has chosen concentration rather than conformity; one who passionately pursues skill (especially technical skill) and imagination, not mainstream social acceptance. 

Now, games like D & D make many people (non-geeks) think of a bunch of 13 year adolescent boys sitting around throwing dice and casting spells and battling imaginary wizards and gnomes or something like that, at least that used to be my take on it, before Ron. Although there is still a part of me that still sometimes thinks it is a game for adolescent boys (and girls), I have learned to respect it more. While I haven’t actually participated in a game myself, nor do I ever think I want to, I have sat in on a few games or at least sat near a few games. It is very interesting to listen to all the imaginative storytelling that comes out of it, it is very strategic, and quite intelligent. That is partly why I could never play – I would never be able to wrap my mind around all of it. It takes a certain kind of intelligence to play these games. I think they bring out great imagination and passion in the people that play them. I actually kinda admire that.  Now, with all that said, I still get grumpy about his “game night”.

Game night on Mondays made me grumpy because Mondays for me, in general are just bad. It’s the start of my week and either I just over did it on the weekend because that is the only time I can really get things done and I am having a bad Fibro flare-up as a result or I was able to take it easy over the weekend but now I have to get not just me but everyone else back to a normal weekday schedule.  Mondays also made me grumpy because at least once a month I would ask Ron to skip the game so we could attend the CHADD parent support group and lecture which takes place every 3rd Monday of the month. He would get annoyed at me anytime I asked him to skip his one night out with the guys. Which in turn not just made me grumpy because I knew what his response was going to be but it also pissed me off. This is our child we are talking about, we go to this meeting for him and for us as a family, besides it’s just once a month. I usually get some grumbling about how he is expected and people rely on him to be there blah, blah, blah… So!? I am relying on you too. To do the right thing for our family. We NEED this, for us, for our ADHD son, for our family. Priorities, remember?!?!?   Then there are the holidays and other random events that may make him miss a game or two. Oh, I don’t know like going to Disney and family birthdays and get together over the holidays, etc.

So for 2009 after missing over a month of game nights in a row due to all the fore mentioned, he asked the guys to change game night to Wednesdays. This way, no arguments about choosing to play a game over doing something important for our family. And in general Wednesdays are a better day/night for me than the dreaded Monday.

Great compromise right? Well it should be. And hopefully it will be, but not today. Today is GRUMPY WEDNESDAY!   

…awww  c’mon it is below freezing here in New York, do you know how much I am hurting right now? My bones feel like they are about to shatter, and I am soo exhausted right now. It is going to be a very loooong night tonight. And I am grumpy about it.

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